Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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