Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
