Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
