i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
