This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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