Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
