69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
