my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
