I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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