So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
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