Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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