Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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