i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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