I'm going to rape someone's good day.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize
