Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Houston, we have a blender
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
