He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
