And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
