You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
barbara walters just said penis...
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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