Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
