Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
