Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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