Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
