maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I can't trust your balls anymore.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
