Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
