Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
