Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
