Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Also, beer. Big fan.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
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