Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
