tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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