just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
