dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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