He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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