All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Say something about gay babies.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
