I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
im holly from the hills drunk
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Is Oprah even human
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
