Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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