I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
