I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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