Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
