So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
