I like to think it a success when the cops are called
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
