i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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