Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
