Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
