I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
