I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
This show inspires me to have sex in space
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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