I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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