great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
