had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
