Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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