Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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